Kindred,
Where to begin?
Penance is not punishment and should not be viewed as a negative or practiced as one.
Penance is an opportunity to rid yourselves of negatives or baggages of sin(s) that cause harm to your soul and impede salvation.
Therefore, begin with a healing heart with a mindset to heal your soul.
Before someone can confess and repent sin, that person has to brave the truth and realize or recognize the wrongs committed.
Not possible to do if groomed or brainwashed into bad behaviors and sins of abuse.
Before praying on the problem, you have to realize there is a problem.
Just as before an alcoholic can take that first step, must state that he or she has a problem with alcohol and are abusing the substance out of control.
How then to realize there is a problem with sin(s), bad behaviors or bad practices?
You have to see and feel the harm it creates in the people you have harmed and the harm within yourself through empathy.
Ask would you like the same things to happen to you?
Then list the harm and damages.
Ask will the things you do be acceptable to the Lord on Judgement Day?
Then ask, are the things you do or have done acceptable to the Holy Spirit today?
If you think you are perfect with nothing to repent or atone for, then work on making yourself better by giving to charity. There are plenty of people in need during this time.
For those that might need to do some serious penance, began with braving the truth, finding the sins or problems, knowing the level of harm and unacceptability to the victim, Lord and self and needed atonement.
Then atone. Confess, repent and atone, and atone again.
Repeat the penance process as needed.
Know that the end goal is to be healed of mind, body and soul, to be on a journey of salvation in love and peace with the Lord.
